There and Back Again

There are many things no one tells you before you have a child. Sure, you could lump these untold things into the catch-all phrase, “your life will never be the same,” but it would have been nice for a more specific heads up on needing a CDL license. No one, not a single person, told me we would need a tractor trailer to haul all our toddler’s belongings to the beach if and when the time came for us to go on vacation. Well, that time came this past weekend, and having a CDL would have been helpful because my wife was determined to leave no stone unpacked. Isn’t it crazy that a creature who weighs twenty-five pounds requires a convoy of vehicles bursting at the door seams with toddler paraphernalia? 

I say just about everything because we did forget one item, small in size but great in import, my glasses. If at some time this week I lose my contacts and can’t see anymore, I guess I will still remember this vacation through muscle memory. Your muscles don’t forget hauling two tons of luggage up beach house stairs. 

In my opinion, it’s all a little ridiculous, the three-ring traveling circus required for a toddler. I mean this is the same human being who is content trying to eat a sea shell. I’m not sure we need to pack twenty books for the boy to read. One would have been sufficient given the fact that there’s a fifty-fifty chance he’ll try reading the book right side up. 

Truly, the boy loves the beach, though. Play in sand. Chase water. Bark at sea gulls. Toddle up to complete strangers (still working on stranger danger). My parents came with us, and I’m not sure who has had more fun playing in the sand, my dad or Thomas. He is determined to teach Thomas how to build a sand castle, but Thomas is more wrecker than builder. He enjoys demolishing the sand castles right after my dad flips over the bucket and plops the castle onto the beach. 

One thing everybody tells you after having a child is “cherish the time you have because it goes by so fast.” To that, I heartily agree. This week has flown by. In a couple days, we’ll be packing up the circus and heading back to the farm. But it has been nice to make memories, even the ones in my muscles. 

P.S. My wife wanted me to post this post-script. If you’re a robber who reads people’s posts about vacations and then goes and robs them blind, please be advised there is nothing of value in our house because, read above, we packed it all and brought it with us.

P.P.S. Even if you are a robber, thank you for reading. It means a lot.