Maybe you’ve heard the theory that opposites attract. Scientists have supposedly proved this theory by magnets, demonstrating that invisible negative and positive ions inside polarized metal bars attract one another, but who really knows? It could be magic causing all this metallic amour, specifically a love potion or Harry Potter spell or something.
So to provide a more tangible example that opposites attract, I’ll posit the following relationship that certainly can’t be explained by a mere love potion–the relationship between my wife and I. Indeed, nothing but a primordial attraction of opposites could bind together a microcleaner and a macrocleaner for a spring cleaning day during Covid-19 times.
Natalie, my wife and microcleaner, set her sights on a small space, a three-foot by four-foot nook, known locally as the only original closet in our house. Back in 1887, when our house was built, extra storage space was out of vogue. In fact, extra space in general was frowned upon, which is why my wife’s ancestors, a family of twelve, once lived happily in our three bedroom house (perhaps the liquor still down in the woods contributed somewhat to the happiness, but mostly, I think, it was the cozy space).
By the end of the day, my wife had the closet immaculately organized with shelf spaces labeled for designated things. However, to accomplish the feat of cleaning, she had to disasterize the area outside of the closet. She pulled everything out that I had stuffed in there over the last year, completely negating a year’s worth of my macrocleaning efforts.
As a lifelong macrocleaner, I’ve perfected the art of stuffing random things into closets, drawers, and under beds to give a room the overall appearance of order. Last week, for instance, I found a lost quarter-inch wrench that I stuffed into my sock drawer many months ago.
Anyway, it was my job to put away all the stuff that my wife had pulled out of the closet– stuff that, in her opinion, didn’t belong there. Thankfully, my wife’s ancestor’s believed in outbuildings, so I divvied up the stuff to appropriate outbuildings and made it disappear. So, after a day of cleaning in Covid times, we had one extremely clean closet and many cluttered outbuildings.